Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
I think I sprained my soul last night
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
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