I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
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