"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
I think people are normalizing furries
Randomize
