I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
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