i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
Randomize
