i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
Why is there a living, breathing cow on your front porch?
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
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