I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
Randomize
