If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
I stole a fireplace last night.
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
Randomize