my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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