he shaved USA in his pubs
two of my INSANE ex girlfriends just texted me saying their coming over because im home alone. needless to say, im deleting my twitter.
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
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