I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
Downstairs neighbor just asked me to tell people when they jump off the balcony next time not to land on her flowers
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
Randomize
