Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
Just realized I've gone to court three different times with papers and a joint roller in my briefcase. #lawyeroftheyear
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
Randomize
