I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
I am mentally ready for anal.
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
Randomize
