with your own penis?
I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
Randomize
