idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
Randomize