We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
Randomize
