Why did I call the Oregon Department of Transportation at 4:30 in the morning, and who did I talk to for three minutes?
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
Randomize
