Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
I've got a tequila scented hand sanitizer for you.
you're the best roommate i could ever have.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
Hey this is your roommate. You know the one that let you have sex with her while you called out your exs name and cried?
I have no recollection of that. You must have the wrong number. P.s. your thongs still on the ceiling fan.
Randomize
