When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
It doesn't matter how many times you look in your purse, Your keys are not going to be there. Maybe you left them at the bar.
Maybe they fell out of my pocket last night when I rolled down the hill.
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize
