How the fuck did you go into work today? You are a better man than I. I couldn't even show up to being unemployed on time.
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
Randomize
