I just made out with a guy for $7.
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
Randomize