Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
Randomize
