I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
You're the only guy I know who could convince a lady at the pharmacy to trade you her pain pills for your antibiotics.
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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