I want to make a zoo with you.
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
25 People Confess The Most Ignorant Thing Someone Has Ever Said To Them
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
Boobs are out for the taking
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
27 Signs That Someone Will Probably Be Bad At Sex
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now