He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
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get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
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Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
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