you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
Randomize
