Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
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