he looks like a really good dad on facebook
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
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