fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
can we get nightvision for the apartment?
My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
