his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
Randomize
