Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
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