1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
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