What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
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