i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
Randomize
