Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
Welp...herpes.
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
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