But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
Dave called me blind fucking drunk thinking he was going to die from drinking with drake bell(wtf?) saying "it's all that drake motherfucker's fault" and later proceeded to tell me "you are my twitter"
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
Randomize
