Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
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