Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize