i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
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