apparently i'm not the first person wake up and realize she's ugly cuz i tore this house apart and there is no sign of my clothes
i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
this beer tastes like vomit already
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
Randomize
