READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
Today's psa: there are certain parts of your body you shouldn't scratch while wearing fake nails.
you just tore your cootch a new one, didn't you?
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
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