I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
Randomize