Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
... I threw up in the shower this morning
You were "I'm not drunk" drunk.
I was feeling sad so bedroom vodka seemed like the best solution at the time.
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
Randomize
