i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Randomize