..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
Watching Miami Social reminded me of how much I miss snorting coke with burger king straws in a life guard hut on the beach until we noticed someone was drowning.
Did you save them?
Who?
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
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