shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
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