better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
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