let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
so my daughter wakes me up this morning and i feel like a vibration so im thinking she has my phone..nope my vibrator
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
Randomize