guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
Randomize
