Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
My gut is currently telling me that Jesus did not intend for us to eat shrimp pad thai on Easter
Is this a considering it or regretting it text?
I just shit out what feels like an entire shrimp with claws and all. You tell me.
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
Randomize
